Big News

Luke 1:36

36 And, behold, thy cousin Elisabeth, she hath also conceived a son in her old age....

Well, in my old age I have conceived a child.  But I'm a little younger than some celebrities who have gotten pregnant lately....so it's not like "Halle Berry crazy."  (She probably has a bit more money to pay for child care and house-cleaning help, but, still.)

I'm sure you are all wondering about various aspects of this surprise, so I will now take your questions.

How old are you, exactly?
Old enough that some of my high school classmates have recently posted pictures of newborn grandchildren. And we aren't going to get any younger as the baby grows up, graduates, etc.  But as I've prayed about this in the past, I've always felt a great deal of peace concerning our family's future. Whatever it brings.

You are aware of the increased risk of Downs Syndrome and other complications your baby may have, given your age?
Yes.  We'll take whatever Heaven sends.

This is a game-changer.  Your youngest will start kindergarten next year, and you would have been entering a new phase of life.
Yeah - here's the thing with that:  I've kind of done things backwards.  I finished college, served a mission for my church, taught jr. high and high school (including being the SBO and then the cheerleading advisor).  As a single adult, I traveled and had plenty of money to buy fun things.  I even owned a cool sports car.  I've already done most of the things that many people put off while they have their families.  I look forward to having more time with my husband someday, but we're really happy to be extending this phase of our lives.
The other thing is that I really love being with my kids.  Sometimes I get excited when I get to go shopping without the kids, but I always end up feeling a little lonely as I push around an empty cart (well - empty of children).  Not having all of the kids in school is not a negative for me.

Can you handle five kids?
Well, it depends on what you mean by that.  Will I be able to keep the house clean?  Probably not.  I can't do that now, so we're just talking about degrees of messiness at this point. :) In general, the juggling act will become a little more intense.  But I am confident that we can all step it up a notch or two and make things work.
Here's what we've got going in our favor:  Our kids are naturally pretty well-behaved.  I know it's bragging to say so, but we often get compliments on our mellow kids.  They are also very loving and play well with each other.  They're buddies, and they'll be so sweet with a new baby!

What will people in your area think when they see you're pregnant?  (You don't live in Utah where big families are common.)
Hahaha!  You are going to wish you could see the reactions we get, I guarantee it!  I can't go to the store with four kids without getting a lot of raised eyebrows (usually accompanied by smiles) and a LOT of, "Are these all yours?" or "You've got your hands full!" My older neighbor always shakes her head and says, "Bless your heart," when she sees me with the kids.  I can only guess at the reaction we'll get when I'm clearly pregnant, and later with the extra child.  Maybe more of the same, but accompanied by fewer smiles. :)  But the good thing about living here is that many of the moms work, and it is the grandparents you see picking up the kids, volunteering at the school, etc.  So people can just assume I'm the baby's grandma. :)

Did you save your baby things from the other kids?
NO!  AAARGH!  Baby items are such sentimental things, that I am confident, had we not moved cross-country, all of those things would still be in a storage room in the basement.  But we did move, and we got rid of nearly everything.  Luckily, Maggie was still in the crib when we moved, so we've got that and the Pack-N-Play she slept in as we traveled.  And a few other things.  (I'm not saying this to solicit baby gifts!!  Really, I'll have a great time next spring scouring garage sales, and shopping Black Friday sales this winter.)

How are you feeling?
Thanks for asking!  I'm great.  My pregnancies have always been easy.  (I don't mean to rub it in, since most of my family members have had miserable experiences.)  I feel a bit tired, but otherwise fine.

Really, the main thing I want to record here, in my journal-of-sorts, is that this was ultimately not our decision.  This may be hard for some to understand, but I have known for some time that we were supposed to have one more.  It just took a while to get pregnant again.  John's philosophy has always been that it is up to me, since I will be the one to go through the pregnancy and will have the primary job of raising the little guy.  He's just always said he wouldn't mind having another one.  (I love my sweet husband!)  We have prayed a great deal, and I have worried sometimes, but I have just KNOWN.

One other pertinent factor:  I was raised in a family of eight kids, and it was the most wonderful thing I could imagine.  My family is functional, close-knit, supportive, and fun!  It's hard to imagine not growing up in a big family.  When I was in Utah, we often got together on Sunday evenings at my parents' home.  If only two or three siblings and their families could come, it hardly seemed worth getting together. :)

When we were little, my parents went on dates with us and gave us as much individual attention as they were able, but the beauty of a large family is that your siblings play a big role.  I think I felt like the younger three were as much mine as my mom's.  (I was eight when Mike was born and ten when Greg was.  Eli will be 11 and Tori nine.  Perfect!)  I adored my older siblings.  Although my mom read to me and laid the foundation, it was my older sister who taught me to read when I was four.  That closeness continues today.  My parents and siblings are all so incredibly helpful when we need them.  They're my best friends - as are John's family members.

When John and I first spent time together on a hike in Zion's, part of what attracted me to him was his family background.  He has eight siblings, and his upbringing sounded so much like mine.  I love his big family!  They have also been so wonderful to us.  We want our kids to have what we have been blessed to have.  I can't wait for our last little one to get here! 

I know the risk of miscarriage is great at my age, so this planning - and even this announcement - may be premature.  And that's OK.  But if all goes well, the baby will come at the end of May.  (So I can still go to Utah in July!!)  If it's a boy, as I believe, we'll name him Hyrum.